Dating in the times of Internet: When she starts live-streaming

Hamed Derakhshani
3 min readMar 23, 2020
Photo Credit: Cristina Zaragoza

A few weeks back I met this girl on Instagram who seemed like fun. She seemed full of energy, had green hair and posted selfies regularly. Oh, and she was really hot!

So I asked her out. It took a little persuasion, but she finally agreed. And we set up a date.

On the day, I picked her up. And was surprised to find out that she is even more beautiful in person. So on that front, there were no problems.

(Before you accuse me of being shallow, read this or search about “attraction in men” and understand that the first thing that attracts men, is appearance. It doesn’t mean that it’s the most important thing, but it definitely matters at first.)

There was heavy traffic on the way so we started talking. First topic was music. She didn’t even know the artists whose music I was playing in the car. I knew most of her favorites but I disliked almost all of them. This had some importance in my mind but I thought it to be not that significant.

Then she pulled out a small mirror and said some stuff about her eyeliner. I don’t really know a lot about makeup but I remember thinking that she was sweet to talk about a feeling of insecurity like that.

We arrived in the area, she suggested a café, we went in. We both ordered tea, cake and a hookah. So I found out that she is a smoker like me. Which instantly made her more attractive in my mind.

We started a nice conversation and I was slowly forgetting about the huge difference in our taste for music. I remember thinking that “this might actually have a future”.

And that’s when it happened.

She picked up her cell phone -which was on the table from the start- and asked “do you mind?” I thought she was going to check something on her phone or call someone and said “sure”.

The she did some stuff on her phone and set it on the table again. But this time, in a way that the camera could see her. I started to wonder about what she was doing. But thought “it’s just another selfie”.

Then she started talking at the phone. And that’s when I knew: she was live-streaming our date!

“What are you doing?” I asked. And she casually said “just doing an insta-live”.

I didn’t know whether to be amused or angry. I think I settled in somewhere between.

It was very funny and unusual for me to see this kind of behavior. I mean who would share something like this live online!?

But at the same time, I felt like she didn’t respect my privacy enough. She would talk to me for a few seconds, then answer a follower, then come back to me.

At least she didn’t show me or say my name or my username like they wanted. So that’s something. But I really didn’t know what my standards were when it came to a situation like this. So I just sat there, going with the flow.

She ended her live-stream eventually and we had a nice enough time. But it was our first and last date. I decided that dating with an audience just isn’t what I want.

What do you think? Has something like this ever happened to you? What would you do, if your date started live-streaming his/her time with you?

I’m genuinely curious to know your thoughts. So let me know in the comments.

And remember! Sharing is caring. So be sure to introduce this blog to your friends.

Originally published at on March 23, 2020.



Hamed Derakhshani

A Freelance Writer & Photographer From Iran